Ugh

I feel like I'm relapsing into wanting to be in a relationship again.

That scares me.

The last two days have been Match hell for me. I was blown off by Bostonman (it's safe to say that's over with - he was promptly deleted from my cell phone) and I made a fool of myself in front of Texasman at the bar last night. Don't know what provoked me to text him and tell him to come out but I did. And at that point, I had had two beers too many. By the time I dropped him off at his apartment, I had had three beers too many.

I likely did not leave a lasting - or good - impression on Texasman, not like it matters that much. He talked politics waaaaay too much. Even through my foggy state of drunkenness, I felt stupid that I couldn't converse about America's current intervention between Israel and Palenstine, or just how I felt about Sarah Palin and the Tea Party movement. Maybe I need to brush up on my politics. Or maybe I need to quit drinking.

"Nothing like beer and politics on a Friday night."

Nothing like one of the worst first "dates" I've ever had.

Jesus.

I have hit some nasty Match rut.

Writerman was going to get back to me about getting a drink after work tonight. Still hasn't. And based on my recent bout of shitty luck, he probably will not.

In hindsight, I realize now just how good I had it during my last time on Match. I had one guy in constant rotation with one or two guys who were transient (not including my ex-douche bag boyfriend).

Where are all the good guys? Why are they not fawning over me?

Three guys now. All duds. And now there's one - Writerman - that I truly cannot wait to meet, but I think I'm just getting ahead of myself.

This is hard work, man. Maybe more so than being in an actual relationship. I think I'm ready to give up my single status. That, or become an asexual human being.