Girl falling for boy with girl's name

Am I really head over heels already? After just one date, two margaritas, an enchilada and a half-bottle of red?

I'm trying not to get too excited about Kman. But I haven't felt like this after one date with any of the dozen or so guys I've gone out with.

He exudes class and is funny. Well-spoken, smart and well-dressed. A polite, Southern gentleman with just a tinge of a Texas accent. Incredibly, incredibly good looking to the point where he's out of my league.

He told me his three-year relationship to the girl he thought he was going to marry ended in April after she refused to move to Jersey with him. So, there's baggage to some extent in the form of a broken heart - but probably not as much baggage as there is on my end.

Other than that, his only other possible dent comes in the form of having to turn on the faucet in order to pee.

I like him a whole lot already and would like to snatch him up like a toy in a vending machine and call him my own. He makes me want to give up my independent, single life and become a domestic girlfriend again. Ack.

I slept at his place last night which is completely unlike me despite my impulsive personality. My mom says I look like I'm "trashy" and "easy." Half a bottle of red was a poor life choice last night. He texted me an hour ago saying he had a "great time" last night with a stupid smiling emoticon, but at least it was some form of contact.

I have this underlying fear of people leaving me, which I have both my father and my ex-douche bag boyfriend to blame for just up and leaving me without notice.

Same feeling goes with Kman now. I know I'm getting ahead of myself after just one date, but I can see myself dating him. Kman says he doesn't do one night stands, he's not a male whore and contends that I'm the first girl he's gone out with on Match - so maybe there is a chance, if he's telling the truth.

I'm caught in between being able to trust someone and keeping my guard up. I've almost always had the upperhand with any guy I've dated for an extended period of time on Match. I always held that power and called the shots. But maybe it's because I never really felt a real, knock-you-on-the-ass spark with anyone.

I'm seeing Oldieman tonight - oh yes, he's back. I spoke waaay too soon in my previous post - for a dinner and a movie (or so he swears. Our last dinner and movie date was a complete flop and involved staying in and a single bottle of Bud Light).

I'm indulging in the attention I'm receiving and feel the game beginning between Oldieman and Kman. I want it to work out with Kman, but in an effort to protect myself, I'll keep Oldieman on the backburner.

I don't like playing games and I told Kman I wouldn't play one with him. But who really knows what he's thinking. He says he really likes me too, but maybe it was the margs and wine going to his pretty head.

In the meantime, til I get this figured out with Kman, I'll ride it out with Oldieman. I'm not saying this balancing act is right, because it's not, but it's necessary. This is where the beauty of online dating transcends into the nasty world of real life.