Irishman date recap

Most. Awkward. Date. Ever.

I almost don't even want to rehash this date. But I will for the sake of consistency.

So he picked a incredibly nice tapas restaurant for dinner. It was super crowded and he immediately asked to switch our table and looked annoyed when the hostess told him she couldn't. Okay. Slight red flag - maybe pink - but I gave him the benefit of the doubt.

I assumed he was nervous because he was really quiet and wasn't really saying much. But the mood of beginning of the night carried into the middle ... and then into the very end. There were weird questions:

(in reference to me staring out the window out of sheer boredom)
Irishman: What's out there? Any suspicious activity going on? Are you going to write about it? About that man walking down the block? (x4)

Me: Nervous laughter. (x4)

Irishman: So, like. What do you want to write about? (x2)

Me: ... (x2)

(in reference to his Match username)
Irishman: So, like. What made you take a chance on JPCG85, (insert reference to my Match username)?

Me: Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

It wasn't only the sputtering conversation that you could liken to that of a car's engine failing to turn over. It was the intense stare he'd give me while I was talking. While I was eating. While I was sipping my glass of rose. While I was staring out the window. While I was yawning. While I was coughing. While I was digging through the depths of my purse to find my chapstick.

He also told me I had a "tough" outershell. About three times. What the fuck?

Holy god. It certainly wasn't the WORST date I've ever been on, but it definitely takes the cake for being the most awkward in the world of awkwardness.

At the very end, I caught a cab and said "It was very nice meeting you, thank you so much for dinner. It was lovely." And gave him a friendly hug, to which he paused when my face was near his and ...

I backed away quickly.

"If you wanna give me a second chance, give me a call," he says.

I was flabbergasted. Did I make it too obvious that I just wasn't into him? Did my bitchiness seep right through my pores? Did he feel this sense of self-loathing because he knows he's just an awkward and boring guy?

Regardless, I don't think it matters now. I sped off in a cab to go meet my pals, leaving Awkwardman far behind.

There just wasn't anything there. Conversation wasn't good. He wasn't particularly funny. He was smart but that was only geared towards "film" and "video."

So while I wash my hands clean of that date, at least I now know of a delicious and affordable tapas restaurant to feast at in the future. Life's small gifts.

Having lunch with Oldieman tomorrow in Hoboken. Going out for Cuban. He texted me this morning with a lone smiley face - nothing else, which I thought was adorable. (He goes a little overboard with the emoticons for a 37-year-old, but I'll let that one slide.)

Sidenote: This Oldieman is not the same Oldieman I refered to back in my earlier posts. I never went out with that 33-year-old Oldieman.

:-)